My allergies are killing me and I am sitting on the couch with a stuffy, yet runny nose... feeling like crap.

Since I feel like doing nothing, I scanned the web and I bring you the most interesting, yet disturbing, articles I have come across thus far:

Latvians Mortgage Their Souls

DIY Plastic Surgery: This is Not a Hoax

Making Lightbulbs Out of 2-Liter Bottles (not disturbing, just interesting)

Canned Vampire Herring

And a disturbing money saving tip... hopefully borne of desperation and not mere frugality: using cloth diapers as toilet paper, collecting them in a garbage can that can be closed up, and washing them to reuse... Ew. I get the concept, but ew.

I came home, ate, and fell asleep for two hours, so now I'm groggy. In addition to that, my allergies have been acting up all day. I just want to go back to bed and sleep until it's time to go to on vacation.

It's been one of the crappiest days I've ever had the misfortune to be a part of and I would tell you all about it except that the person I'm bitching about could very well be you... and then you'd just be that much more disappointed in me -- which is unfortunate, because if you had listened to what I had to say, you might have understood where I was coming from. Instead, you'd already made your assumptions, so you talked over me. You weren't the least bit interested in hearing my side of the story because yours made you feel so high and mighty.

Please don't be offended, if after everything you said to disparage my character, I'm no more than cordial to you. I apologize that I will no longer be able to rush to your defense when people point out your ineptitude. Just rest assured that I'm probably not talking about you, and if you think I am, you should listen to this song by Carly Simon... she's probably talking about you, too. To put it in legal terms -- the characters and events portrayed in this blog are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.

I'm going to pour myself a glass of wine, run a hot bubble bath and forget about everything else.

Ran across an interesting article on how NYC is dealing with its increasing homeless population. Sounds like a decent idea to me, but I do see where the critics are coming from when they say that it doesn't address the underlying issues. It's like a bandaid. It's easy to suggest that families should pitch in and help their own, but that's too simple because it doesn't take into account that some of these people might not have families, they may have drug problems, they may have mental issues, their families might not have the means to help, etc. But to the critics, I ask - is it really up to the city of NY to address the underlying causes? Whose responsibility is it?

It's hard for me to say because I have always been torn when it comes to the issue of helping people (one of the things that intrigued me about Atlas Shrugged). The majority of my makeup is inclined to want to help people who have fallen on hard times, but there's a part of me that bristles at the expectation of it. And the pessimist in me chimes in that some of those people don't actually want help, they just want a free ride in life and they play on people's sympathies. It's hard to know who deserves help and who's just taking advantage, who can be helped and who's hopeless. The problem is too complex.

So on to lighter fare...

I watch tv when I work out on the treadmill (I bought my own because it was $15 less than a year's membership to the gym). Most of the time I watch fluff, because I can't always hear everything, and I'm only half paying attention... it's not the time to watch something I'm truly interested in. That being said... last night I watched Addicted to Beauty. Just what the world needs, another plastic surgery show. A particularly scary one I might add... they make it seem as if you need plastic surgery to look beautiful, when in fact, three of the women on there look downright malformed. Have I mentioned my extreme distaste for lip plumping?

During the course of the show, the owner of the place called everyone into her office to discuss their appearance, and she actually suggested that one of the girls should fix her teeth, told her that she would have had her teeth fixed before she got the breast augmentation if it had been her. She needs to look in the damn mirror before she starts making suggestions. She's a couple of surgeries away from looking like that cat woman. If all that didn't turn my stomach, there's this game on the website to show you exactly how imperfect they think you are.

This article pretty much summarizes my own opinions of the show, except that the reporter thinks the 'game' is cool... Let's call a spade a spade... it's not a game, it's a marketing tool designed to play on your insecurities. If I learned anything from last night's show, it's that they are there to sell you something whether you need it or not (big part of the show was centered around a sales contest).

So after my workout I felt like crap - not about my appearance - I was really queasy, and it stuck with me all night. It was touch and go a couple of times, and I'm not sure I wouldn't have felt better if I had puked... I feel better but I don't want to upset the apple cart by trying to do too much. I'm at home now, watching Ex-Treme Dating... there's not much on and I don't feel like doing anything more than sitting on my butt, so it might be time for a Gilmore Girls marathon (god how I miss that show).

Ah well, this too shall pass.  ;)

I have a new addiction.

I fall asleep with the television on, so I try to choose shows that I've seen a million times like Golden Girls or Seinfeld. It's enough to give my mind something to occupy itself, but nothing to really focus on, and it helps me fall asleep. It's one of the ways that my main character Grace and I are alike (but for the most part we're not). Anyhoo, last night, instead of doing that, I ran across a show called, Extreme Wife. The concept is that a young, single British woman is exploring what it means to be a wife in different cultures, whether they be different countries, or alternative lifestyles. It's fascinating.

The first episode I caught was about mail order brides. She followed a group of guys as they journeyed to Russia to meet the women they'd been corresponding with for weeks or months or years. It was pretty thought provoking stuff; sad and scary at the same time. First thing out of the box is the complaint that western women want to be equals.Grrr. Second thing that irritated me... entitlement... and shallowness. This guy says... "in the US a perfect 10 wouldn't look twice at me, but I can come here and get these beautiful women." Well kudos to you... it's as cringe-inducing as Megan Wants a Millionaire, which I flipped past yesterday (one of the girls from Rock of Love who now has her own show where she's dating millionaires, hoping to land one). The guy was gross, and the lady making the documentary implied that he didn't smell so good... but these women aren't supposed to care about that.... he's doing them a favor... It pissed me off that he thinks he deserves better than what he has to offer... he needs to work on himself and be something worth having (internally).

Okay, so second episode is about free love. I DVR'd it and intend to watch it while I eat dinner (which, on second thought, might not be the best idea). Saw part of the first half and they all look alike to me... long scraggly hair, desperate glazed eyes, and hunger. Seriously, this woman had three lovers and they all looked virtually the same, I thought it to myself and then the journalist commented on it, too.

I'm a monogamist so I don't get it. I like to think that there's more than one soulmate out there for us, but at the same time, when you find one and make that connection, I want the happily ever after. I want the best friend and the lover that I can completely let go with, to trust implicitly. That's my fairytale anyway. To me, sex is tied to emotion. I know that not everyone agrees with me (fine), I know that not everyone is faithful (not fine).

I guess I just don't get the concept.

The thing I can't seem to get past  is jealousy. How do you deal with that? I'm not normally a jealous person unless my gut is starting to sense that something that I just don't want to consciously recognize. I try to go into relationships as a new person, I try not to bring my baggage with me. So even if I'm dating a flirty guy, I tend not to be bothered by it as long as I feel secure in my relationship with him. If, however, I was in an open relationship, I don't see how I could rationalize that to myself, because the guy would actually be sleeping with other women. To me, an open relationship is the precursor to the end. It's a couple who isn't entirely happy with each other, but they don't know if there's anything better out there, so they're auditioning other partners before they let the other go. Things probably work okay until the day comes when one of them finds that person who drives everyone else from their mind and makes them realize that they just aren't happy.

Different strokes for different folks, but on this one I have to go traditional.

I woke up tired this morning, I battled zombies for most of the night. It was a really elaborate dream... sometimes I wish my dreams weren't so vivid.